let me tell you about this dream i had...

this is also for leonie but its me

2007-04-20T06:14:00.001-07:00

this is for leonie

2007-04-20T06:06:00.000-07:00

look:

http://www.myheritage.com

tetrassing my work week

2007-03-08T18:28:00.000-08:00

hey the internet, i've got a question for you, which of these three options do you think is better: working three days a week but any three randomly selected days; working three days but fixed in a tight group (sunday monday tuesday); or working three days every other day (sunday tuesday thursday)? You see, the internet, when i'm at work the only thing i ever think about is how i can make it more bareable. oh! oh! something fantastic happened at work yesterday though, i found out about sweet avocado, you mash up some avocado and mix it with condensed milk, it works like an icing, then i was thinking what kind of cake would you put it on. well, obviously a carrot cake, with little bits of pineapple in it. itll be all orange and green or maybe a really moist chocolate cake. later

looking up at the sky as usual and also at each other

2007-03-06T20:23:00.000-08:00

the other day me and leonie were walking home from emlyns gig and from dinner and so we were full and staring up at the full moon, which was very very full and bright, and talking about how the sky is just a big black blanket that seperates the earth from everything else, and the moon is a big hole in the ozone layer, letting us see exactly what is behind the blanket, so the blackness is the foreground and the brightness of the full moon, in truth, carries over the whole sky. stars are like the hole in the ozone layer but smaller, little pinprick holes. if we took away the blanket the whole sky would be white, bright and just a bit marbled with grey.

Alan Saunders: Given that I am just a rope made of various threads, do I differ substantially from other apparently nonsentient things in the world?

Graham Priest: Oh yes, because you have sentient aspects and other things don't. So that makes you very different in many ways, or makes the local conglomeration, which is currently you, very different.

i was reading this transcript of a radio program from a long time ago and they were talking about buddhist conception of the self, we dont exist, you see, becuase what we think of as ourselves is just an entanglement of constantly changing properties, like a rope is made up of little threads woven together, but not one of those threads continues for the whole rope, they end and then new ones come in. And i like the expression, 'the local conglomeration' as describing a person. it makes me think of a person made up of constantly writhing maggots, shifting in and out of position, sometimes in the feet and then othertimes in the head and not one stays still, always moving, dying, getting born, growing up and turning into moths or flies and flying off to start new human beings of their own. each maggot is a thing about yourself, one maggot is your sense of fair play, one maggot is the way you tie your shoes, another is the way you think about tying your shoes, one maggot is your leg, one is your brain, one is your guilt for not giving that homeless guy the change in your pocket and one is your relationship with your parents and one is your new car. everytime one dies or flies away you will eventually lose that part of yourself but you are still yourself, or more accurately, you never were yourself but you are the same conglomeration, you are treated the same...i guess

why me and dave never get sick of doing stupid things

2007-02-27T17:34:00.000-08:00

i came home from work at midnight ish last night with a shower head, my dogs were barking, my dog was barking and i just wanted to go to sleep. instead, me and dave decided to install the shower head in the back bathroom. first we unscrewed the other one but there was still a little bit attached that looked like it was cemented to the thingie, dave suggested that we use solvent to disolve whatever stuck the little bit to the thingie but i said that was stupid, he said maybe its not suck at all, why not just twist it, well, actually, that might work. so i got a screwdriver and jammed the end through the little bit, grabbed both ends and twisted the little bit off the thingie. everything was a mess, there was a big hole in the wall with a metal thingie replacing the thingie and the little bit that we just took off. we followed the instructions and jammed the bit from the new shower head on the other thingie but something started to leak, i took off the new bit and looked in cause i was kind of freaked that we broke something important. well, we didnt but someone else had, there was a bulbous little shadow wiggling around where the water usually comes out, it quickly pops its little head out of the thingie and i could see this little snake, just one of those tiny ones that can live in your pocket, its head was about the width and shape of my little finger but i wanted to see how long it was. i was pretty scared, because, fuck, there was a snake in my shower, i wondered how long i had been showering witth snake juices or little bits of moulted skin dripping on my hair, but i tried to get it out anyway. i took the ratchet that i had on standby because the back of the shower package says that you should never tighten with arm, so i put the ratchet around the little guys neck just below his head which was poking out about two inches or so by now and tightened it so that i had a grip but so that it didnt squish the thing. i pulled it out slowly and was surprised when it was longer that my hand, longer than my lower arm, longer, shit, than my whole arm! And it kept coming, i was transfixed, i just had to know how long this bastard was. i pulled and pulled still gently and kept looking from his head to the shower, he had this expression like he was not even annoyed but that everything was going according to plan. I got to the stairwell before his end came out of the shower thingie. He was the width of my little finger all the way down but six metres long! when i realised i dropped the ratchet, it was the kind of belated reaction that makes you look stupid to people who are watching. i thought for a second that the ratchet hitting the ground might have squished the little guy's head but he was fine, just snaking along. i thought about calling the council or something but eventually me and dave just decided to let him go in the back yard. i go over to open the door when i see malka wandering in, doing her hunched shoulder im-bored swagger. me and dave both got instantly freaked because we knew what she would do, and she did. malka caught eyes of the little big snake and jumped a few centimetres in the air, then shook her head and barked and barked. dave ran over to calm her down or trap her in a blanket or one of those things that dave is used to doing to malka, while i scooped up the six metres of skinny snake, wrapping it around my shoulder and elbow like a garden hose or a really organised small intestine and i took it outside. i chucked it near the cardimum bush out the back, it might still be there i dont know, but me and dave got the shower attached and now its real strong and shiny for when emlyn and soo get back.

a thought in the shape of a story

2007-02-26T01:50:00.000-08:00

and so here it is, my new creative outlet - though i swear i will finish those shelves - cushioned between the folds of my brain, playing off the different things it finds, protecting the world from losing such pearls as that time in intro to philosophy when i almost lost it cause i thought about how hilarious it would be if everytime the lecturer said 'epistemology' someone barked like a dog, or the time in another class when i thought about the lecturer desperately running after the guy who does the unit evaluation surveys and beating him savagely like in the talented mister ripley.
I decided that i should start a blog after i was thinking about whether in the future people will have to go to school to learn to rap, which is an average thought as thoughts go and people must have thought about it before, but then this scene played out in my head: two people on a first date, the guy is got short brown hair, he looks like the DEA agent on weeds, he's wearing a shirt with a collar and he's shaved, he is really nervous because he cant think of anything to say and he's afraid of screwing this up by being awkward like he screwed up other possible relationships. the girl is very elegant with long blonde brown hair and a silky light coloured sort of dress and maybe a necklace but very elegant anyway and she's nervous aswell because she wants him to start the conversation cause she cant think of anything to say and she wants to know what sort of guy he is. he eventually starts:
MAN: So what did you say you do again?
WOMAN: oh i'm a classical rap singer.
MAN: no kidding, do you have a position somewhere or are you freelance?
WOMAN: yeah, i work with the WA Opera Company but sometimes i do private shows.
MAN: really? I saw some shows of theirs a while ago but nothing recent, i bet you had to work pretty hard to get into the WAOC.
WOMAN: uhuh, i studied for a few years overseas at the Docter Dre Memorial Conservatory. Actually I only did a minor in rap; my major was in tagging. It wasnt until a few years later that i decided to go back to UWA and get my masters in human beatboxing. I did a project with the WAOC during my masters and after that they hired me as a rapper in the chior and then later i got bigger parts.
MAN: wow, you must be so talented, haha, have you got anything showing at the moment?
WOMAN: yeah, right now we're doing Dem Viennese Suckers Ain't Shit, at His Majesty's.
MAN: oh yeah, i here thats good, a classic right?
...and so on...you can imagine how his keeps me entertained at work right?

in the future i plan on bringing you more of the same, like the time me and leonie talked about what it would be like if your tongue was a living thing that just hung around in your mouth of its own accord, or if your tongue had other tongues, which had other tongues which had other tongues, and the smallest tongue within a tongue is immortal and you cant see it even with the most powerful microscope, and that little tongue is where your soul lives and so when you die all of you decays except your tiniest tongue, which floats around in the air, and when you think about all the people who have died and all the tongues that must still be floating around we must be constantly breathing in tongues, souls of people who have died, sometimes eating them, other people's souls passing through your intestines and elsewhere... or the time me and simon and laura and probably some other people thought about what if thoughts were liquid or gas and if you couldfind the place in your brain where the liquid lived and put a hole in it so all your thoughts would ooze out down your face, and everyone would be able to see them and think wow, that guys got some cool thoughts or even your most embarrassing thoughts like, 'i wonder if my left arm is longer than my right arm'. and people would bottle and sell really good thoughts as a fashion accessary, like hair gel, people would brush it through their hair and go out, so punks could squeeze really dangerous thoughts into their mohawks or people on dates could where thoughts that make people think, 'aaaaw, what a nice thought', you could give thoughts as presents so it really would be the thought that counts...